Yesterday was Father's Day. It was a time to honor Fathers. Mr. Wonderful celebrated by puttering in his basement (often referred to as the Man Cave).

My man tends to need "cave time". There is always a big demand on his time so time to "tinker", putter, or just unwind" is a real luxury.
When he does relax he feels guilty since there is something pressing that he could, should, or have already done.

After church I made him a steak dinner with fresh vegetables and corn on the cob. He also had the luxury of reading an entire book without interruptions (good thing he is a fast reader!) I even made him dessert!

Thinking about Fathers made me start missing mine.

Several days ago we had a new volunteer ( a 17 year old girl that is very quiet) she was working on scraping off loose paint from the window sills before we could caulk, sand, and paint them. Our Suzy always plays questions and answers whenever we are on a road trip so I started asking everyone questions trying to draw her out and learn a little more about her.

The question asked was, "What is one of your first memories of church?"

Various answers followed, VBS, church camp, a wedding, stain glass windows in the sanctuary.

I was transported back to my childhood and the one memory that stood out in my mind was sitting next to my dad in the church service. I was a wiggler and a giggler so was assigned to sit next to my dad so he could give me "the eye" when I got too antsy. I was intrigued by my Dad's big hand compared to mine. I would study it and play with his hand. Occasionally we would play a game where he would suddenly grab my fingers and my job was to keep him from entrapping them in his grasp.

This normally would keep me entertained and quiet for at least 20 minutes till I would suddenly break into gales of laughter causing my mom to give both of us "the look" that instantly brought both of us to attention and make my Dad suddenly stop playing and start looking stern. We both knew it was to satisfy my mom because there was always a twinkle in those merry blue eyes.

I miss my Father's Hands. He was a good hugger, tickler, coach, adviser, and the first man in my life. I miss his "Dutch Uncle" talks where he would tell me what he was thinking and why without trying to spare my feelings.

Our son was named after my Dad and I see many characteristics in him that were in my dad.

I am so blessed by the men in my life. They are all wonderful husbands and fathers or (husband and potential dad in training). May each of you be a special memory in life of your child.

Labels: Fathers, Monday memories

I love pictures and especially ones of my grandchildren. This picture is our divine Miss Em in a white flower girl dress. Emma loves comfort clothes like her Diva, but occasionally enjoys dressing up. This dress weighs almost as much as she does and she wasn't very happy when her mom dressed her up.

Now I ask you.....is this a happy face?

Becky works with the Girl Guides in Canada and co-leads a group of "Sparks" which are girls that are about 6 years old. Emma loves to go with mom to the Sparks meetings and the girls have adopted her as the troop mascot.

This is a happier Emma "Twirling" around the floor in her long white dress with the Sparks. I love this picture because it reminds me of my childhood. (Yes, Emma your "Dita" was once a little girl who loved to twirl in front of the mirror and watch my full skirt swing.)


Becky's co-leader Adriane , rents out flower girl dresses and brought the dresses to a meeting so the girls could wear them . Isn't it amazing that girls like to dress in white dresses and dance and twirl around the floor. It seems to be something instinctive with girls (even little ones) . Emma seems to be holding her own on the dance floor.

When I was in grade school full skirts with lots of petticoats (or can-cans) were popular. The fuller the skirt the more can-cans you wore. I liked the swishing sounds it made made when I walked and twirling in front of the bathroom mirror at school was almost irresistible . It made me laugh to think that girls are girls no matter what their age and still enjoy the simple things in life.

Don't you just love the tights under the dress? Who knows....flash forward twenty years and this could well be the same little girl in a long white dress only with a veil and a groom
waiting for her to waltz down the isle.

Labels: Emma, Monday memories

We're Back. Yes, just like many American families we went over the river and through the woods to grandmother's house. (Except in our case it was more like over the mountain and through the Hampton Roads Tunnel which isn't nearly as lyrical!)

Mr. Wonderful and I left Wednesday afternoon before traffic got too heavy. We were able to spend several days with my mom and help her . Mom has macular degeneration and was dreading writing her Christmas cards. We were able to print her Christmas letter including family pictures and print out mailing labels to put on her cards. She was very happy and relieved to still be able to keep in touch with her friends.

We also helped rake and bag leaves in her yard. Mom had already exhausted herself raking and bagging most of the leaves. Mr. Wonderful was able to get most of them up with the lawn mower. There are still more leaves yet to fall but we at least made a small dent and hopefully she won't wear herself out doing yard work.

We also played Parchessi while we were there. I learned to play this game as a child and we always played whenever we would go and visit my grandmother (my mom's mom). Grandmother was the best Parchessi player I ever knew and I think my mom has taken over her title. (Maybe it gets past down to the oldest female in the family....who knows?) We would role the dice to see who went first and then we would role the dice to see who got to play partners with grandmother. Whoever won Grandmother....always won the game!

Mom never has to count out the board. She can role any number and get to the right space without having to count each space she passes. She has a nack for being able to roll just the right number to send your player home, to get out, or move up the ladder. She does have a little trouble now seeing the dots on the dice but no trouble knowing her options. I never have the option of letting her win.....I'm always trying not to be humiliated or so exasperated that "I accidentally knock the whole board over." Sorry!

We went to Sunday School and church with her today and headed back after lunch. I am thankful that she is in good health, has supportive church friends and is very independent. (Sometimes too independent!) We were able to get her a cordless amplified phone that seems to be helping her hear much better. She called this evening and said, "Can you hear me alright?" I had to laugh, as me being able to hear her was never the problem!

Mom turns 82 this January. I think she is quite remarkable!

Labels: Monday memories, Parchessi, thanksgiving 2008

I'm a sweet girl. I'm kind, thrifty, courteous, and all those virtues in the Girl Scout handbook. If I had any faults it would be that besides being sweet, I love sweets.

I've never met a brownie, pie, or cookie that I didn't like which is why my talking scale would say to me, "Please, just one person at a time!" (That was right before I took out the batteries and tossed it in the trash.)

As much as I love baked anything, you could be hurt if you stood between me and a piece of cake! Marie Antoinette would have been sainted if she had told me to "shut up and have a piece of cake!".

We didn't have cake very often when I was growing up. Cake stood for special celebration...Birthdays, Christmas, Holidays or special occasions. I had to share my birthday cake with my baby sister who has a birthday 5 days before me. As you might have guessed there wasn't much cake left to even blow out the candles. I have noticed that if I'm mad, frustrated or stressed I bake. Yes, Sarah Lee and Little Debbie are personal friends of mine. (How did you know?)

One vivid memory I have of cake was in Sunday School when I was about 12. The teacher asked for volunteers to help and of the course the boys were way too cool to volunteer. So she gave each girl a piece of cardboard with various items printed on them. Mine said, "Entertainment". She had us stand up front with our signs and asked us if any of us knew what a budget was? She explained that what we were holding were items that our parents typically had to spend their money on every month. Then to our great delight she pulled a 2 layer cake out of the box and started dividing the cake into percentages we had assigned the various categories. Of course Housing, and Food got the biggest pieces. I remember her asking me how much of the budget should be spent on Entertainment.....of course I said "All of it!". After laughing and telling me that many people do spend almost their entire budget on entertainment she gave me a small piece (about 10 percent). By then the boys were demanding to participate so she handed out a few more parts of the budget. Finally all the cake was gone but there was one more cardboard sign left. It said, "God". The boy who had that card looked very forlorn when the teacher handed him the empty plate with just a few crumbs left.

It left a lasting impression on me that we give God the crumbs....not the first piece or even the best piece but the leftover crumbs.

Do you have a favorite food? Why is it so special to you?

Labels: birthday cake, Monday memories

Years ago The Blue-eyed Girls Club (consisting of my daughter Suzy and I) went to movies . Mr. Wonderful and the rest of the clan were not with us when we we decided to sneak off. This movie came out in 1995 so Suzy would have been 16.

I knew what the movie was about because I had read the book and I carefully explained to my impressionable teen that the movie was about a married woman who had an affair while her family was away. I explained that I personally thought it was wrong, but I wanted to see the movie to see Clint Eastwood as a romantic lead instead of "the dirty Harry" character he usually played.

So....for two hours we sat in silence and watched the drama unfold. What followed was one of the best talks that she and I probably ever had. We began to discuss the movie and the question came up..."When did the heroine cross the line?' "When did the innocent flirtation become an invitation to sex?" We were free to openly discuss their actions and behaviors because they were not us. There was no guilt, shame or reproach but just honest observations.

We were able to see when the interest and flirtation subtly changed and what steps could have been taken to stop it . We also discussed what might have happened to the heroine's family had she run off with the National Geographic Photographer.

As a parent we make all kinds of mistakes.....this particular event I count as a high point of motherhood, what could have been just a few hours of escapism turned out to be a serious lesson on how easily it is to be swept away by our emotions and make bad choices.

Has a movie ever led to a serious discussion with your kids?

Labels: Monday memories, Movies, Suzy

Mr. Wonderful is an ordained minister and has preached many wonderful sermons. He has preached in many small churches where there is no nursery and has competed with noisy children, sleeping parishioners and crying babies. He can take all this in stride and never loose his patience or train of thought as long as it is not one of our children that is making the commotion.

We were visiting a church in Dickinson, North Dakota. I was nine months pregnant with our son and our girls were 2 and 4 years old. Being a wiggler when I grew up, I had several items to keep the girls quiet and entertained during the service .

The children of this congregation were allowed to run in the aisles of the church and none of the parents seemed to mind or even pay attention. I could see that Mr. Wonderful was distracted and growing annoyed at the children's antics.


As the sermon progressed, our Suzy ( a terrible 2) suddenly decided to stand up on the pew and flirt outrageously with the people behind us. This did not go over well with dear ole dad who promptly turned her around and sat her down in his lap. Suzy decided that this was a good game so popped right back up. This up and down behavior continued several times and I finally heard the dreaded words that all of our children hated to hear. "If you do that one more time, I'm taking you outside."

Being taken outside meant that that punishment was close at hand. All our kids knew that "being taken outside" was not for fresh air! Usually the threat was enough to bring the desired obedience but it wasn't working that day with Miss Suz. She apparently thought that the show she was creating was far too much fun or that dear ole dad wouldn't fall through with the threat.

Always one to push the limits, Miss Suzy continued to smile and flirt with the amused people behind us until Mr. Wonderful grabbed her up, threw her on his shoulder and stared walking in a stern manner toward the door. Mr. Wonderful was embarrassed that His children were the ones causing a disturbance . Suzy instantly knew she had pushed dad too far and started pleading, wildly....."I'm sorry Daddy, I'll be good, I'll be good!"

Seeing that her pleading had no effect on Dad and also seeing people were starting to chuckle at the sight, Suzy went for the big guns. She imploringly looked at the entire congregation and said in the most dramatic voice of a two year old, "YOU ALL PRAY FOR ME!"

Her pleading statement sent the entire church into gales of laughter and embarrassed Mr. Wonderful who couldn't get Suzy out the door quick enough. The pastor picked up on the situation and said, "What that man is doing is Biblical and right. We need to teach our children to respect God's house and many of you need to follow his example."

What was your most embarrassing church story?

Labels: Monday memories, Prayer, Suzy

My good friend Floozie posted a Monday Memory about Easter when she was growing up. Since both of us are" vintage classics" I could readily agree with her conclusions.

Easter at our house was a dress up occasion. My sister and I always got new spring dresses, white gloves, hats, socks with lace and new shoes.

No one in our household was fond of hard boiled eggs so my mom would tap a small hold in the end of the eggs and blow them out. The eggs were hollow then and we would dye them and decorate them and eventually hide them.

The Easter bunny usually hid candy marshmallow eggs for us to find and there was always a chocolate Easter bunny in our baskets.


Grandmother was usually the source for the Easter Dresses for our girls. We would hide plastic eggs that would either have candy of surprises inside for the children. They loved to hide them and find them all day long.
This picture is of Becky's first Easter dress when she was exactly 14 months old (same age as Emma).



This is me with Suzy. It was her first Easter and she looked liked a little Easter chick herself. One of my aunts had crocheted a yellow baby sweater and cap. Her little dress was made by my sister-in-law Auntie Anne from material that my brides maids wore at our wedding.






Andy was showing off his new jacket, pants and tie one very colorful Easter in Savannah. Note the azaleas in full bloom.


What a transition for me...from being a baby, to having babies and now watching my babies have babies. God is so Good!

Labels: Easter memories, Monday memories

Guess who is pregnant? If you said me.....guess again or click here. We are so excited!

Mr. Wonderful and I had been married for 4 years before we were able to conceive . We both had some physical problems that had to be resolved and we also had the elders of our church pray and annoint us. One little elder looked at us and said, "Ok, I'll pray that you can have children but don't blame me if you can't stop."

Our oldest was born between blizzards. If she had come on her due date Mr. Wonderful would have had to deliver her. On my due date, Mr. Wonderful looked at me and said, " If you plan to go into labor today I'll need about 6 hours to dig out the car!"

Our other two children were born in August......I think we learned it was better to have summer babies than try to predict ice and snow in Montana and North Dakota.

Congratulate me....I'm going to be a Diva again. May their tribe increase!

Labels: Monday memories, Suzy

I have only passed out cold once in my life (I've had a couple of near misses but I'll get to that soon!) My mother was an excellent seamstress and used to make most of our clothes. She would have us stand on the kitchen table so she could mark and measure the hems of our skirts. Because we were elevated, she didn't have to sit on the floor. The system worked well till I passed out.

Being a typical rowdy girl that did not like to stand still, much less wear dresses, my mother basically had to threaten me to get me to cooperate. Once she had me, she would not allow me to escape till the task was completed. I liked to twirl and jump and squirm and it wasn't often that Mom would let us, much less encourage us ,to stand on the kitchen table. Every time I turned it seemed like the measurements would be off and Mom would have to start again.

Finally she had me stand in the middle of the table and told me not to move. She decided it was easier for her to move around the table marking the skirt than to have me jump all around. It was a good system and would have probably worked but no one told me not to lock my knees. As I stood there I virtually cut off my blood supply to my legs. I remember saying to my mom, "I'm not feeling very good" and bang down I went off the table and on to the floor.

My Dad, being a military man told me later that he had seen lots of recruits fainting while standing at attention in basic training. He told me the secret of not passing out while remaining at attention was to wiggle your toes. I never passed that secret on to my mom and come to think of it she never let us stand on the kitchen table again.

I almost passed out again right after our first daughter was born. I went to the bathroom with the assistance of the nurse and remember the room starting to turn black, and I saw little lights begin to spin. Fortunately, I was already seated so I just had to put my head between my legs , get some cold water to my face and thankfully the feeling went away. They tell me that was because of volume loss from the delivery.

The last two days have also been near misses on my passing out countdown. I am one week past surgery and have really felt well up till then. It seemed like every time I would get up to do a simple task, or just walk into the kitchen I felt like I was going to pass out. I would have absolutely no energy, break out into a cold sweat, get deadly pale and somewhat faint.

I am blessed with an overactive imagination and can have liver cancer in 30 seconds or less. I began to feel like Fred Sanford in "Sanford and Son" and say to myself, "This is the big one Elizabeth, I'm coming!" I do not like the feeling of sudden death, or passing out.

So yesterday after feeling faint just sitting in church, we went to the ER at University of Virginia. Basically, I found out 8 hours later that I'm going to live (thus the happy dance image of this post!) My electrolytes were out of balance and the fluid pill I normally take was making my potassium level low thus causing the horrible fainty feelings. They gave me some potassium pills, IV fluids, told me to quit taking the fluid pill and assurance. I say it was a good tip. (Almost as good as wiggling your toes!)

Have you ever passed out?

Labels: all about Me, Monday memories

This week is our Emma's first birthday (Friday) so it started me thinking about her momma's first birthday. Since I started thinking about birthdays it sent me searching for pictures to scan . Emma's is to the left and her Mom is on the right. Emma is much bigger than her mom at this age.






They look a little more alike in these pictures. I think Emma looks a lot like her handsome daddy but she definitely has lots of Momma's personality traits.






We were living in Montana and Becky's first birthday was celebrated with "Adopted" family as all our family lived back East. We will be missing Emma's first birthday this year but can attend via Web Cam and have pictures instantly. What a wonderful world we live in!

Labels: First birthdays, Monday memories

My darling daughter Becky is back to work after a year's maternity leave. Her transition back to work and Emma to day care has gone quite smoothly but it did bring back memories of having to go to work while my children were still small.

Six weeks after boy wonder was born I started a new job at the area hospital. Because I was a new employee, I had to work full time for the first six weeks on the day shift. Finding day care for a newborn, 2 year old and 4 year old was quite a challenge as we only had one car at that time. We finally found a sweet young girl who agreed to care for the children in her home for the six weeks orientation.

I had to be at the hospital at 6:45 so it meant getting up at 5 am to shower, dress and gather up the clothing, shoes, diaper bag, cereal and lunches for the children. We would put the sleeping children in the car and take off to the babysitter. Then there was the transfer of children followed by Mr. Wonderful dropping me off for the day shift. He would go on to work and take a late lunch to go pick me up from work.

I would drive him back to work while he ate his lunch in the car and then go after the children. By the time I had transferred everyone back into the car seats and strapped everyone in, it would be time to go pick up Mr. Wonderful from work. It was hard on all of us but the only way we could juggle our commitments.

The children were grumpy when we transfered them from their nice warm bed into the cold car. One day I forgot to pack their shoes so the girls were very upset with me as they had to stay inside all day. Children adjust so quickly that I really thought they didn't mind all the shuffling around we were having to do. They liked the babysitter and although I felt stressed trying to nurse the baby, work, keep up with the home front I really thought that the girls handle the transition better than I did.

One morning as we began the "into the car shuffle" very sleepy Becky looked up at me in her pink footed pajamas and in the wisdom of a veteran 4 year old said, "Let's not go to work today, OK Mom?" That's when it dawned on me....they felt they were working too.

Those six weeks were some of the longest days of my life but it helped to know we were all working together.

Labels: Becky, Monday memories

We always had a nativity scene set up in our home as part of our Christmas decorations. When the children were small we had a child friendly set with each of the figures made out of felt filled with beans so the children could play with the them without breaking it.

When the girls were small we would set up the manger without baby Jesus in it. The girls would do their chores and try to do nice things for each other or for us to earn some soft hay to put in the manger to make baby Jesus a soft bed. The hay was usually straw from the broom but they were so happy to be helping baby Jesus. Occasionally big sister Becky would tell her little sister that they were helping baby Moses. Baby Jesus would make his appearance on Christmas morning to a manger filled with straw from the deeds of loving children and we would all share his birthday cake.

As the children grew older I used to find other things that were new and different at the manger. One year instead of an angel announcing the birth perched on the front of the stable I found a Superman action figure standing on the stable roof ready to take on any evil doers.

One year the wise men travel from the east following the star on a Tonka truck. The following year the wise men arrived at the stable bearing machine guns. One year the wise men didn't arrive at all....I found them after Christmas still in the box and was informed that they wouldn't be arriving for another year or year and a half after the birth so they really shouldn't be at the stable at all. Most of this Manger Mischief occurred while I was at work and the kids always waited anxiously for me to notice their alterations.

We laugh at these stories now but I am glad that our children were raised to know the true meaning of Christmas and felt an intimacy with story.

Labels: Monday memories

Christmas is very quiet at our house now that the kids are grown and are on their own. I love Christmas and love to decorate but it hardly seems worth the effort with just Mr. Wonderful and myself here.

I got a scanner for my birthday and have had a great time looking at old pictures . This picture is baby Suzy's first Christmas. She was also baby Jesus that year in the nativity play as she was the only baby in our small church. Big Sister Becky (almost 2) was the littlest angel.


The following year the girls were more interested in decorating themselves than decorating the tree. This was the year that we started doing an Advent Calendar for them. They had no concept of time so on Thanksgiving afternoon we made a paper chain and made a link for each day till Christmas. The Christmas link was made from shiny paper and very distinct from the other links. They cut one link every day so they had an idea of "how long till Christmas". As they grew older we would write an activity on the link such as "Watch a Christmas movie", "make Christmas Cards", "sing jingle bells and go on a sled ride", "make Christmas cookies"....etc. I think I looked forward to the activity more than the girls did.

Did you have any family traditions that you did with your kids when they were growing up?

Labels: Becky, Christmas memories, Monday memories, Suzy

I am the proud owner of a collection of Christmas earrings. I have plastic candy canes, wreaths, red high top tennis shoes with a Christmas teddy bear sitting in it, bells, angels, bows, snowmen, snowflakes and Christmas trees.

My collection was started by a little blond hair boy who bought them for me at the school's "Christmas Store". Every year he would add to my collection being very careful not to repeat the same ones I already owned.

I love Christmas and any gift the children picked out was always highly praised and worn with great pride. Now that they are grown I still love looking back and remembering how proud Boy Wonder was to have "picked them out" all by himself.

He would probably disown me now if he saw me wearing them. His fashion sense has greatly improved now that he works in the Big Apple.

If you hear jingling in the background it's just me with my sleigh bell earrings looking over my collection and trying to decide which pair to wear next.

Did your children ever give you "special" Christmas gifts?

Labels: Andy, Monday memories

When our children were small we would some times pile in the car for a long trip after Mr. Wonderful got off work at 5 p.m. He would drive till about 10 p.m. and then I would drive all night.

Since I worked the night shift I was used to being up all night. Give me some tunes on the radio, a clear night and this girl will chalk up the miles. The following morning Mr. Wonderful would take over while I took cat naps and entertained the children.

Traveling with small children is always a challenge. We would give them a toy or sticker book to entertain them and would plan on stopping every two hours to let them get out of the car and run around. We would run them till they were more than willing to sit in the car for a while longer just to rest up.

One night everyone was asleep in the car, except Mr. Wonderful and myself. Up pops a bright-eyed 4 year old Suzy, who is full of excitement and lots of questions. "Where are we?" she asks as if she is the family navigator and must check the map for our coordinates.

"Ohio" answers a grumpy dad who has been driving way too long and is tired and crossed.

"Oh," she says, "Is that near grandma's house?".

"NO", answers grumpy dad....."we still have a long way to go and I'm tired."

"Well, I'm not, " answers Suzy who had been sleeping for the last two hours.

"Do you want to drive then?" asks grumpy Dad sarcastically. ( Sarcasm is so lost on children!)

Suzy gets very small and quiet....she is obviously seriously thinking about this request from her beloved father. Finally she answers....""No " she said, "I might bump somebody."

Needless to say we both got a good laugh from her thoughtfulness and decided to stop for the night since we were both exhausted .

Labels: Monday memories, Suzy

Our son Andy was born with a collapsed lung. He was taken by ambulance to Bismark, North Dakota to the NICU (Newborn Intensive Care Unit) about 100 miles from where we lived.

It was a frightening time for us, as there was some speculation that he might have Newborn Emphysema which is fatal. My dad had emphysema, and eventually died from it, so he was miles away thinking that he has some how transmitted the disease to his namesake, through me. My mom had come from Virginia to care for the girls so Mr. Wonderful and I followed the ambulance on the long drive to Bismark. It was one of the worst experiences I have ever had to go through....leaving the hospital without my baby.

Our small community of Dickinson, was predominately a Catholic community. Our son was born at St. Joseph's Hospital (also a Catholic Hospital). Mr. Wonderful and I are not Catholic and do not practice the concept of infant baptism. When the x-rays, revealed that the lung was collapsed we were asked by the nurse if we wanted our son baptized. We graciously thanked her for her concern and calmly explained that we believed that our son had been prayed for and dedicated to the Lord since his conception so baptism was not necessary.

She looked at us somewhat alarmed but returned to the nursery. The next time I saw our son I noticed , written boldly above our last name on his bed, was this phrase, "Unbaptized Protestant". Our baby had been red flagged to all the Catholic nurses that worked in the nursery that this sick baby had pagan parents who did not understand the eternal consequences of not being baptized. I can only imagine the number of times that our little boy was baptized by sweet, caring Catholic nurses on every shift!

The baptisms continued in the NICU unit as he was again red flagged with "Unbaptized Protestant" on his nameplate at the Catholic hospital in Bismark. After speaking with the only Neonatalogist in North Dakota, we were assured that it indeed looked to be a collapsed lung and he was put under a Oxyi -hood that delivered concentrated oxygen for 24 hours. The lung re-inflated itself and we were able to take Boy Wonder home.

Our son Andy, is quite the charmer and has one of the biggest hearts of anyone I know. He is kind and incredibly sensitive to those around him and especially his friends and family. I some times wonder if the prayers and "baptisms" of all the nurses he encountered in the first few days of his life have made a lasting imprint on our boy.

It amazes me how sometimes being red flagged actually works to your advantage!

Labels: Andy, Monday memories

Years ago I was asked to speak at a funeral of an acquaintance. I say acquaintance because she was a co-worker and like the heart on the the left, (by Pierre Marcel)was a "prickly personality". I didn't dislike her, but she irritated me and I guess I really didn't want other people to know that we were friends.

She died suddenly after a routine surgery. She threw a blood clot to the lungs and was dead before her husband could even get to the hospital. She was in her early thirties and had a teen-age daughter and a baby boy at home. We went to the same church and were the only Protestants at the Catholic hospital were we worked.

The Sisters of Mercy wanted to hold a memorial service for her, but had no idea how non-Catholics conducted services so I reluctantly agreed to help. I didn't have a long history with "Barbara" as we had only been in the community for less than a year.

I did remember that she was the one person who came to visit our daughter Suzy , ( age 2) when she was in the hospital and bought her color books and new crayons. She also brought over boy baby clothes that her son had outgrown when she found out our new baby was a boy and had sister hand-me-down clothing.

As I began talking with the nursing staff that had worked with her, I began to see a pattern emerge. Yes, she was irritating and at times impossible to get along with.....but she was also quick to spot a need and fill it.

I heard story after story about how she had brought over a plant when a co-worker moved to a new home, brought over meals when another was sick, and stayed with a dying parent at the hospital so another co-worker could have a break. She always "just appeared" and did what ever was needed without ever being asked or expecting anything in return. She gave her maternity clothes to a nursing assistant that was pregnant and even kept her little girl when she went into labor.

I was amazed at how this insensitive, irritating, and at time exasperating personality had reached out to those around her. I was ashamed and embarrassed as I remembered my last encounter with her and the last words I ever said to her.

We working together in the nursery and for some reason she asked me point blank, "Do you really like me?" I faltered, not knowing what to say. Yes, I did like her, but I also tried to distance myself from her because of her sharp tongue and rude manner. So I shrugged my shoulders , smiled weakly and said, "You've got your moments!"

Looking back now, I wish I had taken the time to affirm and validate her. I think about "Barbara" every fall, even though it has been over 25 years since her death. I think about her when I am quick to write some one off because their personality is grating or over-bearing. I have to remind myself to try to see past their sharp comments and thorny exterior. I've also learner to appreciate and look for the good in people.....even though I some times I need to be "a heart reader".

Labels: all about Me, Monday memories

Two of my three children have birthday's this week and I'm feeling very sentimental. The picture on the side occurred the summer Mr. Wonderful and I decided to let the kids plan our Summer Vacation.

I was homeschooling the children so we made it a class project. They decided they wanted to go to Atlanta and North Georgia so the first thing they did was put together a jigsaw puzzle of the city of Atlanta. The puzzle had icons where various sightseeing sites were located. After the puzzle was completed they looked up the sites that intrigued them to see how far they were, the cost and how much time they wanted to spend at that location.

Before we left our home in Savannah, each child was given a camera, film, and a notebook to record their trip. Their itinerary was well thought out and of course had many sites of interest.

Our first day was spent entirely at 6 Flags Over Georgia. They rode every ride and we left the park exhausted. The second day we went to the Atlanta Zoo, Cyclorama, and Stone Mountain.
We stayed to see the lazer show that evening and went to our motel exhausted. The next day we went to Sci- Tech (a kid friendly, hands on museum of science and technology) Underground Atlanta, the World of Coca Cola, and the museum located in Atlanta's City Hall and that night we went to a Braves Game (their first major league game.) Again we were exhausted by the time we reach our motel.

The following day we headed for the North Georgia mountains and to the city of Dahlonega. Dahlonega was the place of the first gold rush in the Nation so naturally the kids wanted to try their hand at gold mining. They soon found out it was hard work so we toured the gold mine museum and other nearby sites including Babyland General Hospital in Cleveland, Georgia (home of the Cabbage Patch Dolls) and Amicalola Falls State Park where this picture was taken.

Mr. Wonderful and I had to agree that it was a great vacation the children had planned. I'm wondering if that how Suzy's interest in planning unusual itineraries started. She is really good at finding interesting places to visit where ever they travel.

Labels: Andy, Becky, Monday memories, Suzy

My dad was a Colonel in the Air Force and it seemed that we moved at the worst times in my life....including my senior year of high school. Being the new kid in high school, especially during your senior year puts you on the bottom of the food chain. You don't know the teachers, kids, your way around the school, or even the rules of conduct in your new environment.

I took Chemistry my senior year because I needed it for college. There were two Chemistry teachers and I found out too late that I had the hardest, meanest, but best teacher. The kids affectionately called her "Bloody Mary" as she always gave a quiz every morning with two questions. Two questions.... you either got 100, 50, or zero on a daily basis. (I personally thought it was a major victory to make a 50 which is still failing!)

Bloody Mary not only was the Chemistry teacher but also the Honor Court Judge and believe me you wouldn't want to have to face her! One of the rules at this new school was that you had to write, "I have neither given nor received aide on this test" on every test or quiz and sign your name. I thought it was really silly to have to do that because in my mind.....if you were going to cheat on the test you most certainly would lie about it!!

Bloody Mary ruled with an iron hand. I suppose that she would have to since she was dealing with chemicals , fire, and stupidity. She called us "yoyos" most of the time and occasionally she would say, "Ok you rutabaga, just sit there and vegetate!" The woman scared me to death and greatly intimidated me. I struggled with Chemistry and only passed because I had a great lab partner that would juggle the equations and our findings to make it work out right.

Our lab final was two hours long. It counted for 75 % of our final grade. I needed to get a good grade on this test. We were given 10 unknown chemicals and had to find out what they were by preforming various test that we had learned that year.

Before the test started, Bloody Mary, stood up before the class and said, " You must write 'the pledge' on your test papers or I will not even grade it!" Immediately most of the class obediently wrote "I have neither given nor received aide on this test" and signed their names.

I thought to myself....why sign it now...they haven't even taken the test yet.

So the test began. It was hard. Some of the chemicals were easy and were quickly identified. Others didn't seem to want to be identified no matter what test I did on them. The time quickly flew by.....I knew 8 of the elements but two still escaped me. I worked feverishly on one and final found what it was. One more to go....test after test failed, what was this element? My heart was racing as I heard the bell ring and the class began to exit the room.

"Come on People!" Bloody Mary yelled. "If you haven't figured it out by now, it's too late! Hand in your tests." Just as she said this, the last test came out positive. I hurriedly wrote down the element and handed in my test.

I floated out the door doing a happy dance. Yes! I would pass chemistry! I would graduate and go on to college. I would be a nurse, a healer, Florence Nightingale move over .....here comes Daisy.

Halfway down the stairs to my next class I was overwhelmed by the reality that I had not written " the pledge" on my test paper. A spirit of doom overwhelmed me, I immediately turned around and started taking the steps two at a time to get back to the chem lab. Tears were falling freely as I ran back into the classroom and into the surprised gaze of the teacher that I feared the most.

"You don't have to grade my test" I said sobbing. "I forgot to sign the pledge!".

"You What??" she said, staring at me. "You Rutabaga, Did I not stand up in front of the class and tell everyone that I wouldn't even grade a test that didn't have the pledge written and signed?" she asked with all the fury of a class 5 hurricane.

Still sobbing uncontrollably I shook my head in agreement that she had.

" Is English your second language? "she asked with scorn. " I don't speak stupidity."

"No m'am " I said tears streaming. "I just forgot....I finally figured out the last element as the bell rang", I barely managed to say between sobs. " I just forgot", I said in a whisper.

It seemed like a long time pasted as I stood there crying, envisioning having to tell my parents I wouldn't graduate with my class and going to summer school with Bloody Mary.

"Alright, "she said. " Quit crying, I will grade your test but I am taking 10 points off....now get out of here", she said handing me a late pass and a Kleenex.

At that point, I would have kissed her feet!!! I've never been more relieved. Turns out that I made a 90 on the test....I had correctly identified all of the elements. On top of the paper was the grade and written in big red letters were these words...." And you know why!"

Years later as a register nurse, I walked into a patient's room and recognized my high school chemistry teacher . Her first words that greeted me were, "MY God, What have I released on the world??"

I learned a lot from "Bloody Mary". I passed college chemistry easily because of the foundation she had drummed into me. I learned about firmness and rules, and that "mercy"can still be found behind the roughest exteriors.

Labels: all about Me, Monday memories

I have always been a person who embraced life with great exuberance and gusto. Life was a daily mystery with strange and delightful twists and turns. My world was a safe place where strangers smiled at children, neighbors knew your name and it was safe to play outside till the street lights went on.

Life was simple and pleasant. I loved kindergarten because you could color, cut with scissors, play with other children and sing. I loved to sing and what I lacked in musical ability I made up for in volume. I was thrilled to find out that my class would be able to sing two songs in my school's Christmas program. We practiced our two songs for weeks before the performance. I knew those songs backwards and forwards! I could sing louder and longer than all my friends!

Imagine my surprise and delight to be singled out with four of my peers for a special assignment the day before our big day. My teacher called the five of us over and explained that life was composed of "White bunnies and Brown Bunnies".

"White bunnies" she said, " get up on the stage and sing, but brown bunnies are special! " "Brown bunnies get to act!"

Did she say Act? A star was born instantly that day! I had grand dreams of being a dancing snowflake or prancing elf! My teacher, had chosen me! My parents would be so proud! My sister would be envious of my success!

We all eagerly awaited our new assignments with breathless anticipation. " Tomorrow night," she said, "While all the other white bunnies are singing I want you brown bunnies to act like you are singing but don't utter a sound. It's our secret, so don't tell the white bunnies! Lets see if anyone notices!"

The night of our school's Christmas program came and went. My class preformed jingle bells and one more song. The White bunnies sang and the brown bunnies acted their little hearts out. The five of us became Opera soloist without ever uttering one note. Paverotti could learn from our performance. We opened our mouth wide, gestured frantically , and swayed with the music. We threw ourselves into our roles and for that brief moment we were stars!

Later that night my older sister asked me why I was swaying and jumping around on the stage looking like a wide mouth bass out of water. I told her my secret.....I was special, I was a brown bunny! Had she been older and wiser perhaps she might have let me have my moment of stardom, but reality is cruel, and she told me that brown bunnies can't sing and my teacher didn't want us to drown out the other kids.

So I've spent my most of life knowing that I am a Brown Bunny. Brown Bunnies don't sing, Brown Bunnies don't......(you fill in the blanks). I've lived my life with the brown bunny mentality..... I've finally decided that brown bunnies are special.....we have a rare ability to not take life so seriously. We sing off key, we dance to the music in our head, we laugh inappropriately, we love intensely, we celebrate each day and each moment.

Little did I know that my kindergarten teacher gave me a great gift....Hi, my name is Daisy and I'm a brown bunny!

Labels: acting, all about Me, Monday memories

Summer time always brings back warm fuzzy memories of Girl Scout camp, church camp, swimming pools, watermelon, fire flies, and of course Vacation Bible School. We went every year from cradle roll up to high school (when we became helpers and finally were recruited into becoming teachers.)

When I was in the 5th grade I went to two Vacation Bible Schools each with the same songs, stories, Bible verses, and crafts. I enjoyed the first one but I became a VBS Star in the second. We were visiting my grandmother in another town and I went with my cousins.

The music teacher loved me because I already knew all the songs and sang with great vigor and volume (and mostly off key). What I lacked in skill I made up for in enthusiasm. ( The kids all hated me and thought that I was a show-off and of course they were correct.)

The Bible teacher loved me because I knew all the answers and already had memorized all the Bible Verses. She used me as an example to motivate the other kids to memorize scripture. I got to march in front of the group holding the Bible because I had memorized the most Bible Verses. ( All the kids hated me because that was an honor and I wasn't a member of their church.)

The craft teacher loved me because I needed no help with the craft and could whip up great looking items having had the benefit of seeing what other kids had already created the week before. She found my suggestions helpful and thought I was very creative. (Naturally all the kids hated me and my cousin was getting tired of my "helpful suggestions".)

My 5 days of stardom quickly came to an end but I still look back on that experience as a high point of my childhood. I was reminded of this experience one summer and let my children attend another neighborhood church's Vacation Bible School.

Although they were a little nervous at first they all quickly adapted and seemed to have a really good time. Mr. Wonderful and I attended the closing night program and were making the rounds to visit the classrooms of our three children.

A very nice looking young woman came up to me and began to tell me how much she had enjoyed teaching "My son Bud."

I smiled politely, and said, "I'm sorry, but you have mistaken me for someone else. My son is Andy."

She looked rather startled and said, " I don't have any Andy's.....aren't you Bud B.......'s Mother?"

Believe me.....my last name is very unique, there weren't any others in our city. Mr. Wonderful occasionally called Andy "Bud" as a pet name. We were amazed that he had told everyone that his name was Bud and had answered to it all that week.

His teacher and I laughed about his new identity. Later, when I asked him why he became "Bud" for the week. He just shrugged and grinned and said, "Why Not?" so maybe he was having his chance to be a VBS star too.

So to all of you who are giving up your time, energy and talents to help with VBS this summer here's a big shout out....you may be making this summer someone's best memory of childhood.

Labels: Monday memories

How do create an instant love affair? Here's our recipe.

Take one part baby,
One part longing grandparents

Mix in time, distance and desire.

Add financial difficulties and personal injury.

Slowly let it simmer for 4 months.

Add in passports, international travel, and a" 5 minute meltdown 10,000 feet in the air".

Sprinkle with jet lag, a very tired Mommy and Daddy, lots of luggage and baby items and present it wiggling and cooing to an appreciative audience.

Then stand back and listen for the "ohs and awes" and rave reviews.

Well, at least it happened that way with us.

Miss Emma is everything we every hoped for and then some. Yesterday we got to babysit for about 4 hours and found her to be delightful, entertaining, full of energy and yes....we found out our baby has a temper too!

Girlfriend absolutely adores "Poppy" (but then, so do I). Mr. Wonderful was so funny and delightful. When he held her and walked with her on his shoulder she snuggled really close and both of them were caught up in an invisible dance of adoration.

He would smile over at me and say, "Am I doing this right?" I would smile back and say, " Do you hear any complaints from her?" Emma is very generous with her smiles and girlfriend loves to make sweet baby noises. If she takes after her Momma and Diva she will be talking up a blue streak by the time she's a year old.

We are totally smitten by our first grandchild. Everything she does is delightful. Mr. Wonderful laughs at her smiles and coos and is instantly transported back to the time when we were first time parents. He has all the right moves now and much more confidence in his "baby reading" skills. It seems to me he walks a little taller and is much more observant to her every gesture.

Watching people play with babies is now one of my favorite past times when not actively engaged in the game myself. Life is amazing, looking at this incredible gift from God we can only imagine what she will see and experience in her lifetime. Today I am content just to lavish love and affection on Miss Emma and "steal kisses".

Labels: Monday memories

We lived in Savannah, Georgia for 17 years. Our children grew up there and it's amazing to me how many stories I didn't know till they grew up and started reminiscing about their childhood.

Slowly some of their erratic behaviour began to make sense. We lived in a three bedroom home. We had two girls and one boy so it only made sense that the girls share a bedroom and the boy got his own bedroom. When the children were small we had the younger two in bunk beds in the same room giving Becky (our oldest) her own bedroom for a brief time.

When the time came for the girls to share the bedroom Becky told her brother ( about 8 at the time) that if any burglars broke in during the night that his bedroom was the first one they would go into and he would most likely be killed. Shortly after this big reveal we noticed that our son would sneak into our bedroom in the middle of the night and sleep on the floor by our bed. I would invariably almost step on him on my way to the bathroom.

Having no idea that his older sister had implanted this thought into his young impressionable mind Mr. Wonderful started locking him out of our bedroom. The next morning we would find him asleep on the floor between his sisters' beds. They soon tired of finding Andy on their floor and found navigating around him in the middle of the night to be just as cumbersome so they also began to lock him out of their bedroom at night.

We would then find Boy Wonder asleep on the floor in the hallway between both bedrooms. Mr. Wonderful tried talking to him to find out why he wouldn't sleep in his bedroom during the night but to no avail.

One Saturday Mr. Wonderful and Suzy went to local garage sales (their favorite father-daughter bonding time together) and came back with a beaded curtain. Boy Wonder claimed it immediately and made Dad put it over his doorway that same day. It would rattle every time you went in or out of his bedroom.

We discovered years later that it was Andy's burglar alarm. He decided that if he heard the beads rattle in the night that it would mean that a burglar was coming to his room. It would give him enough warning that he could jump out the window or scream for help!

The rattling beads was enough to let him sleep peacefully in his bedroom every night afterwards. Who knew that a few strings of beads hanging over the door way would provide security and a good night's rest?

(Side note: Older sister Becky disavows any memory of this incident!)

Did your children have monsters under their beds or night terrors? How did you handle them?

Labels: Andy, Monday memories

When my oldest daughter was about 3 years old we moved from Montana to South Dakota. She was somewhat traumatized seeing her toys and clothing packed in boxes and moved out of the house. The concept of moving wasn't one she could grasp yet. As we got in the car she looked longingly at everything she had ever known and said, "Bye-bye house, bye-bye toys, bye- bye clothes." Even though we assured her that there would be a new house when we got to South Dakota and that she would see all of her toys and belongings, she was not convinced.

We rode for quite a long time and Becky was playing quietly in the back seat keeping her sister entertained with books and toys. I turned around and told her how pleased I was of her for being so sweet to her sister, what a good helper she was, and how proud her Daddy and I were of her for keeping sister happy on our long trip.

Becky looked at me somewhat stunned for a moment or two and then very deliberately reached over and pinched Suzy on the arm as hard as she could right in front of me so I would be sure to see her do it. Suzy immediately let out a howl of pain followed by a hurt angry, mad cry that sky rocketed to ear splitting decibels.

I quickly popped Becky on the hand still shocked by her actions. Becky's eye's began to well up with tears that spilled down her cheeks.

"Why would you pinch your sister?" I demanded. "That was so naughty of you!" "You know better than that!" I insisted.

No answer came, just big crocodile tears. Finally, in desperation, Mr. Wonderful pulled into a gas station so I could console Suzy while he dealt with the Little Miss Naughty .

While I took Suzy into the restroom Mr. Wonderful put Little Miss Naughty on his lap and asked her what was going on.

"Why would you hurt your sister right after Mom told you what a good girl you are?" he asked.

With pouty lips and quavering voice she answered, "Cause I was thinking mean thoughts about sister and mom made me feel bad by telling me how good I was."

Mr. Wonderful hugged her and told her that even grown-up have mean thoughts at time especially when they are tired and confused but it was never right to do wrong. He explained that "poor sister certainly didn't understand why she was pinched and that she must tell Suzy she was sorry and make her feel better."

What a tender conscience, to feel so bad about getting undeserved praise, that you feel that you need to be punished!

Did you ever have an experience like this? How did you handle it?

Labels: Becky, Monday memories