- Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a conniption fit, and that you don’t “HAVE” them, you “PITCH” them.

- Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc., make up “a mess.”

- Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of “yonder.”

- Only a Southerner knows exactly how long “directly” is - as in: “Going to town, be back directly.”

- Even Southern babies know that “Gimme some sugar” is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table.

- All Southerners know exactly when “by and by” is. They might not use the term, but they know the concept well.

- Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who’s got trouble, is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold potato salad. If the neighbor’s trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a large ‘nana puddin!

- Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between “right near”and “a right far piece. They also know that “just down the road” can be 1 mile or 20.

- Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the difference between a redneck, a good ol’ boy, and po’ white trash.

- No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn signal is actually going to make a turn.

- A Southerner knows that “fixin” can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb.

- Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines.

- Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they’re
related, even if only by marriage.

- In the South, ‘y’all’ is singular….’all y’all” is plural.

- Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.

- Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.

- When you hear someone say, “Well, I caught myself lookin’,” you know you are in the presence of a genuine Southerner!

- Only true Southerners say “sweet tea” and “sweet milk.” Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it — we do not like our tea unsweetened. “Sweet milk” means you don’t want buttermilk.

- And a true Southerner knows you don’t scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say,”Bless her heart ” and go your own way.

- And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all this Southern stuff, bless your hearts, I hear they are fixin’ to have classes on Southernness as a second language!

- And for those that are not from the South but have lived here for a long time, all y’all need a sign to hang on y’alls front porch that reads “I ain’t from the South, but I got here as fast as I could.”

* Thanks Jade I totally needed a good laugh...now I'm fixin to head off to bed! So shut my mouth and hush my puppies, night all ya'll!